Forget Double Downs and Dorito tacos... this is a pizza with a crust made of Kraft Dinner

Via lolriot

I guess there's nothing new under the sun. If this ad is from the '80s, which I'll assume from the font and layout, the Kraft beat KFC, Taco Bell, and even Epic Meal Time in the innovation of extreme junk food mashups.

This pizza with a Kraft Dinner (Mac & Cheese, for my American readers) crust is both intriguing and horrifying. Anyone up to test-kitchening it?

Does anyone else find the new Kraft peanut butter bears a little creepy?

Via Kraft Canada

This morning, I happened upon a group of colleagues scrutinizing a jar of Kraft peanut butter. As ad people, we are overly sensitive to changes in branding.

Consensus? Creepy. "It looks like they're looking at you through a peephole" said one.

"They remind me of Pedobear" was my contribution.

"What?" was the response?

So I had to school these innocent young women in the dark ways of the internet. 

"Pedobear" is a really gross and disturbing internet meme popular with people who find pedophilia jokes amusing. It's characterized as a cartoon bear (above) that sexually attacks children. 

Meanwhile, the teddy bears on Kraft peanut butter jars have been part of fond Canadian childhood memories for generations.

Via VincentAbry.com

Damn you, internet...

One Million Moms against sexualized men

One Million Moms have their hands full these days, as advertisers keen to tap into the demographic of aging, sexually confident, women create "equal opportunity" objectification ads starring men.

Case in point is this Ktaft Zesty Italian campaign (above) which also has a video component:



Of the campaign, they write:

Last week's issue of People Magazine had the most disgusting ad on the inside front cover that we have ever seen Kraft produce. A full 2-page ad features a n*ked man lying on a picnic blanket with only a small portion of the blanket barely covering his g*nitals. It is easy to see what the ad is really selling. A person has to look closely to see the item the company is marketing because the salad dressing bottle is so small next to the male model, picnic basket and other food items. There is also a small Kraft logo in the upper corners with the words "Silverware Optional - Let's Get Zesty." The website getmezesty.com is listed in the bottom corner. 

Kraft has gone too far and will push away loyal, conservative customers with this new ad campaign. Christians will not be able to buy Kraft dressings or any of their products until they clean up their advertising. The consumers they are attempting to attract - women and mothers - are the very ones they are driving away. Who will want Kraft products in their fridge or pantry if this vulgarity is what they represent? 

One Million Moms cannot get over the gall of this company. It is unnecessary for Kraft to use s*x to sell salad dressing! (An asterisk is used to ensure our emails get through to those who have signed up to receive our alerts. Otherwise, referencing specific words would cause our emails to be blocked by some Internet filters.)

This is not the first time that OMM have been upset at "s*x" (even str*ight s*x) in ads. Last August, they called for consumer action against Ragu for showing a boy accidentally walking in on his f*cking parents. And there was that time they complained about the double ent*ndres in this Liquid-Plumr ad:



More recently, the moms tried to rally the troops against Philips Norelco, for the latest in their series of humorous manscaping ads (see the classic one here):



Of this outrage, OMM writes:

The new Norelco commercial goes beyond a close facial shave to body grooming well below the chest and back. This commercial went WAY TOO FAR! During the commercial, it shows a man trimming hair in different areas of his body. Toward the end, it shows him standing with his boxer shorts down with hair falling to the floor as he uses the hair trimmer. It is implied that he is shaving in his private area. The dialogue in the ad is equally offensive. "I'd wink at me; I'd hug me," he says. Then he looks in the mirror, admires himself, and says, "I'd F*** me." The F-word is bleeped out. But then they display their website, www.IdFAQme.com. This is clearly a play on the F-word.

Clearly.

The most interesting thing about One Million Moms, at this point, is that their protests draw positive attention to the campaigns — like a reverse Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval.

Me, I just want to note how men's sexuality in advertising is so often displayed in an ironic, goofy and self-aware way, compared to the un-ironic and unaware meat display of many (most?) sexualized ads with women.

Cadbury introduces chocolates just for women (and German men)

Via The Guardian

Cadbury recently announced, in the UK, that they will be launching their first new chocolate bar of the 21st Century. But the marketing strategy is very old-fashioned. This chocolate bar is aimed specifically at women.

So, what makes a chocolate bar feminine? (And why didn't they call it "Crispella"?

The Daily Mail quotes a Cadbury spokesman:

"The mix of wafer and chocolate is a lighter way to eat chocolate and we know from experience that women are attracted to this particular format. 

It will also appeal to women because it is in three separate portions so they can consume a little at a time rather than in one go."

In other words, "we know that women love chocolate, but are afraid to be perceived as fat. So we'll use those body anxieties to sell them portion-controlled candy snacking."

It's hardly progressive. It's actually kind of insulting. But it is part of an emerging trend of sex-specific product marketing that reinforces stereotypes. Remember "Be." wine? Or Dr. Pepper 10? We actually seem to be getting more gender-typed in this millenium. That is, if we buy those products.

The marketing isn't the only thing backwards about the new Cadbury offering. They couldn't even come up with an new brand.

"Crispello" has been marketed before, but in mainland Europe. (By another Kraft brand, Milka.) And in this ad, it's aimed at men:



It also has a different filling. In the UK, it's chocolate. In Germany, custard.

If you live within its range, soon you won't be able to escape the gendered marketing blitz. Starting October 8, the sweets will be launched with a £7m marketing campaign in "women’s press", outdoor advertising and point of sale (POS), with the tagline "A little treat for you"

Aren't you lucky, toots?

Velveeta celebrates "That Guy"

You know the one. He works a mindless job at the mall, and doesn't give a shit. You... yeas YOU... can eat like you also don't give a shit:



And that's the big idea behind this new Velveeta Shells & Cheese campaign from W+K, Portland, ironically positioning the highly-processed comfort food as the go-to nosh for losers.

It could work. I've known plenty of guys like that.

They also have a campaign microsite, inviting fans to add to the list of those guys...

Tip via Toronto Egotist

Oreo does its part in the mainstreaming of gay pride

According to AdFreak's David Griner:

Around 8 p.m. Eastern, Oreo posted a gay-pride-themed picture featuring a six-layer cookie colored like a rainbow, with “June 25” and the word “Pride.” The caption said “Proudly support love!” (The significance of the date is unclear, at least to me. San Francisco’s famous Gay Pride Parade was the 24th, as was the one-year anniversary of New York’s Marriage Equality Act.) 

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: the tipping point for gay acceptance in the United States is well behind us. Marketers know this, which is why you'll see big suburban, soccer-momin', minivan-drivin',  Fifty-Shades-of Grey-hidden-in-the-bedside-table-readin' brands like JC Penney are standing up to the anti-gay lobbies.

Besides which it's not as if Kraft has anything to fear from "One Million Moms". They already pissed off those fundamentalist astroturfers when they used the colloquial euphemism "shut the front door!" in an Oreo ad last winter.

The response, both positive and negative, has however made the Oreo Facebook page blow up real good...

Although when I visited it, I discovered that this wasn't the first rainbow Oreo:

Kraft's "mixed race" snack ad is all kinds of wrong #FdAdFriday

I'll let Bradley Koch from Sociological Images take it from here:

"The problem with a marketing campaign like this is that it trivializes the experience of people with multiple racial/ethnic identities who are still often met with derision and confusion. The first ad above perpetuates the self-fulfilling prophecy about “confused” identities. As a child, I remember family members telling me that they didn’t have a problem with interracial couples but worried about how others might react to their children."

Yeah, what he said.

And Kraft just keeps going and going with the awkward and inappropriately racialized gags.









WTF?

Creepy anthropomorphic animals sell energy drinks #FdAdFriday

At first, I thought I was watching one of those awful Star Wars prequels. But it's an ad for some "liquid water enhancer" (AKA, sugary syrup full of stimulants) produced by Kraft.



The pitch:

"Welcome to the Watering Hole. It's just your typical neighborhood hangout, if your neighborhood is full of crocodiles, giraffes, ostriches, and overly amorous lorises who like to shake things up."

The "male" one is even weirder:



"Dirty Hyena"? What exactly do they mean by that?

Tip via Ads of The World

Real Women of Philadelphia (of Canada)

What makes a "real" woman? Cooking for her family, of course!

At least according to this promotion from Kraft:





Well, okay. It's pretty traditional niche marketing aimed at women: a recipe contest. No different from Pillsbury bake-offs from days gone by, but now socialized on Web 2.0.

The part that makes me uncomfortable is the "Real Women" tag. Real Women of Canada is a social conservative group who have, for many years, positioned themselves as reactionaries to feminism. They believe women should be stay-at-home mothers if at all possible, and the oppose publicly funded childcare. They are also anti-union, anti-human-rights-commissions (?), anti-choice, anti-divorce and anti- same-sex marriage. (As well as wanting softcore "porn" — meaning any "explicit sexual material" — totally banned.)

This is hardly the kind of apolitical, nicey-nice brand association a big wheel like Kraft would want to muck about with. But there it is. Probably an unfortunate accident, when they adapted the "Real Housewives" reality show theme.

On the other hand, though, "Real Women of Canada" have been around since the '80s. I remember them from the time when more and more women were entering the workforce. How could they miss that, when going through the legal and Google hoops copywriters and client legal departments go through to secure a trademark?

RWoC didn't have any issues stealing the U.S. Girl Scouts logo, though...

Maybe they're trying to take back the "real women" tag, but I doubt it. I think it's just lazy research and an unfortunate coincidence between a contest the reinforces women's exclusive role in the kitchen and an organization that wants to keep them there.

That said, the hosts seem like nice non-crazy people:
 

Naomi Campbell pulls the race bar on Cadbury ad

How do you react to this ad?

If you're Naomi Campbell, your reaction is: "I am shocked. It's upsetting to be described as chocolate, not just for me, but for all black women and black people. I do not find any humour in this. It is insulting and hurtful."

And now Cadbury faces a possible boycott over it.

Operation Black Vote's Simon Woolley has written to Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson, asking them to mobilize the African-American community over this. Because although Cadbury chocolate is not sold in the United States its parent company, Kraft, is the largest confectionery, food, and beverage corporation headquartered in the US. (Ironically, the Kraft takeover of Cadbury led to many boycott calls from UK chocolate fans.)

"Racism in the playground starts with black children being called 'chocolate bar'," Woolley Explains. "At best, this is insensitive, and at worst it demonstrates Cadbury's utter disregard for causing offence. Its lack of apology just adds insult to injury. The Eurocentric joke is not funny to black people.

"It's particularly galling because we've just had a week that saw the establishment fall over themselves to be close to the Obamas and yet black people are being derided in such an insulting and negative way."

But do you really think the creative team was even thinking about the colour of Naomi Campbell's skin? This is a women who, when sentenced to perform five days of community service with New York's sanitation department for assaulting her housekeeper, "attended her community service wearing designer outfits, including fedoras, furs, and—upon completion of her sentence—a silver sequined Dolce & Gabbana gown."

If you're going to choose someone to personify the word "diva", there are few who wear it so well.



But unlike Dunkin' Donuts, Cadbury did not pay Naomi Campbell for the use of her name. I'm pretty sure that's what got her attention.

And the racialization of the ad? I'm sure it was unintentional. Although the comment about "chocolate bar" (is that a common slur in the UK?), or the fact Borat often used "chocolate people" as a derogatory term in his wanderings, at least show that offence can be taken, if you're looking for it.

Cadbury insists the campaign was "a light-hearted take on the social pretensions of Cadbury Dairy Milk Bliss". They have, however, pulled it.

I think the real moral of the story is "don't fuck with a supermodel".

A great Kraft Dinner ad

Well, okay. It's American, so it lacks the folksy branding that Canadians know and love. But still a great idea and sweet execution.



Who hasn't stolen off their kid's plate?

Social responsibility disclaimer: Please feed your kids this comfort junk food in moderation. Try the whole wheat.

As if anyone has served it as a side dish to a healthy dinner in, like, ever...

Kiddie Advertising

In today's Ottawa Citizen:

Canada's big-name food and drink companies are meeting their commitments to advertise less to children and to promote more nutritious products and an active lifestyle when they do target youth, according to a compliance report from Advertising Standards Canada.

The article references the Canadian Children's Food and Beverage Advertising Initiative, which companies such as McDonald's, Kellogg and Kraft voluntarily sign on to.

It states:

In advertising directed to children, it is appropriate to favour foods that contribute important nutrients that may otherwise be at insufficient levels in children’s diets; moderate the consumption of fat, saturated fat, trans fat, cholesterol, sugars, and sodium, which are generally over-consumed in the typical Canadian diet; or, of particular importance, moderate total calories in their diets.

Sounds great, eh? But this little gem was buried in the Citizen article:

The nutrition criteria also varies by company. The guidelines that McDonald's uses meant the only brand it advertised directly to children last year was its Chicken McNuggets Happy Meal with milk and apple slices. McDonald's has also changed the way it uses its famous Ronald McDonald mascot in advertising and the red-headed clown character now promotes an active lifestyle, not hamburgers and fries.

Okay, so McDonalds complies with this by putting Ronald in yoga pants and telling them to eat their McNuggets with milk and apples dipped in sugary sludge? Seriously?

Suspiciously, McDonald's nutrition calculator doesn't even seem to have options for kids meals. But I'll propose that deep fried chicken and caramel are not exactly "healthy" meal choices. Fun, sure. Even tasty. But it's not something I'd let my son eat regularly. It's treat food — not sustenance.

And there's the problem. McDonalds is still advertising to children. (As are others, but McDonald's is the leader.) It's still targetting kids so they'll associate McDonald's engineered flavours with comfort foods early on, and will drag their parents to the golden arches at every opportunity.

This is progress in responsible advertising? I must be missing something.

Or maybe I'm just mad because my son recently told me that my gourmet, hand-made, organic beef burgers grilled with hickory smoke and served on a whole wheat bun don't taste as good as McDonalds. That's right — they got him too.

(Image taken from here)


UPDATE: Validation from Quebec...

In light of the report released on the Canadian Children's Food and Beverage Advertising Initiative, the Quebec Coalition on Weight-Related Problems (Weight Coalition) is encouraging Canada to develop legislation that is similar to Quebec's, to govern this type of advertising. According to the Coaliton, Canadian companies do not deserve the congratulations they are nevertheless receiving from Advertising Standards Canada (ASC), following the self-regulation measures that were implemented in 2007 and are being evaluated today.

Wiener envy

As the recession wears on, consumers are starting to embrace cheap food again. As a result, the humble hot dog is making a comeback.

Of course, demand fuels competition, and the big news on tubesteak marketing right now is the false advertising suit Sara Lee has launched against Kraft for saying that the former's Oscar Mayer Jumbo Beef Franks have been "proven" to taste better than that latter's Ball Park franks in a vaguely documented "national taste test":

According to Sara Lee, "The suit claims Oscar Mayer is presenting a taste superiority claim against the entire line of Ball Park branded hot dogs - this is both false and misleading to consumers. Such claims contain an unclear and inconspicuous footnote in very small type that also falsely implies that more than one variety of Ball Park franks was tested."

"This is a weak attempt by Oscar Mayer to mislead millions of consumers with false and inaccurate claims. Simply put, we believe that these untrue statements are all a bunch of bologna," said Chuck Hemmingway, brand director.

Bad puns aside, it's interesting just how seriously this affront is being taken, considering the subjective nature of the claims.

Personally, I think that Sara Lee is just jealous of the massive viral campaign Kraft has used to penetrate the social media.

For example, Oscar Mayer's YouTube group has generated an enormous consumer response. By tapping into American consumers' endless hunger for Internet fame, the campaign manages to collect great moments of awkward modern Americana like this:



The beefy new franks are also targetting the mommy brigade, featuring in blogvertising like momstakeonthings.com:

"Hot dogs and summer just seem to go together – whether at baseball games, backyard barbeques, or just as a quick and easy dinner before dashing off to camp, practice or the pool. But they can be a much healthier mealtime option by choosing all-beef franks, and Oscar Mayer’s Premium Beef Franks are the best tasting ones that I’ve come across."

Kraft/Oscar Mayer is fuelling its social media efforts with a huge weenie giveaway, handing out a million dollars worth of hot dogs last Wednesday in advance of Memorial Day Weekend.

It's interesting to note that the other wiener in the battle, New York's classic streetmeat Hebrew National, has avoided the controversy. Instead they played to their base, giving away 45,000 hot dogs today in Times Square.

I doubt my family and I will be joining any of these big brand sausage fests over the summer, though. To be honest, industrially-processed meat kind of grosses me out. (Did you see that "Meat International" site? Eeeewwww.) I'll keep getting my hot dogs hand-made by a local master in Ottawa's Byward Market. At least I know where that sausage has been.